Goodbye 2007

This morning I woke up feeling refreshed and happy. My sister is in town with her boyfriend and my husband was snuggling next to me. Although, going to work on New Years Eve really sucks I felt pretty happy. I jumped in the shower. I don’t know about you but the shower seems to be where I have all of my greatest thoughts, such as they are. So as the water poured out I remember that when I through away my favorite jeans: the ones with the hole in the crotch and the beginning of a hole on my butt. I had thrown away my Belk Gift Card. My $11 dollar gift card was in the dumpster!

You see, yesterday I had frantically been cleaning up my tiny apartment because my sister and her boyfriend were coming to spend New Years with us. In my haste I said I love these ten dollar Express jeans from Good Will, but they have Got To Go-- You know the holes and all. So I chunked them. One less thing to wash! YeePee and then I asked my husband to take out the garbage.

He did… and this is why I found myself at 7:55 am racing to the dumpster. I don’t know about you but I have to work One Whole Hour for Eleven dollars and I’ve had my eye on two Beau-t-ful brown towels at Belk that only cost $8.00. That $ll.00 would cover taxes too!

So I fished around in the dumpster. Jumping around and yelling “If there are any rats around please don’t let me see you!” Finally, I ran back to my apartment begged my husband to help. While promising to bonk me on the head if the card wasn’t in my jean pocket he fished out the ten dollar express jeans and I got my $11.00 Belk gift card! Brown towels here I come.

And that is how I started my last day of 2007.

First Post of August!

Graduate School starts for me on Monday. I have 1 day left of freedom and this is how I’m spending it:

1) Grocery shopping

2) Cleaning the bathroom and washing clothes

3) Having dinner with the future in-laws

4) Supper with our awesome friends

5) Familiarizing myself with Valdosta’s Website (luckily very similar to Georgia Southerns web-site)

6) House Hunting

7) Trying to finish Harry Potter

Yes! I said House Hunting! Here’s the story: Our wonderful cat, Smitty, made his great escape while family was in town last weekend for Scott and my shower. We were devastated. We looked for him everywhere, put up flyers and I constantly scanned Lanier drive for him. We even ran an ad in the Herald. After 2 days and 2 sleepless nights we found him and brought him home! A Happy Ending. (Picture is Smitty as a baby)

Now the spark: I love Georgia Southern University. I love the students and I hope they enjoy GSU as much as I did. But, I no longer want to live around them. I hate all of the traffic, both cars and foot traffic, around my apartment. I hate that my dog and 2 cats don’t have a yard of their own. And after almost losing Smitty, I decided I had had enough. The very next day I went to the bank and found out we could buy a house!

Owning your own home is the American Dream! I’m more excited about buying a house then I am about planning my wedding. I’ve been dragging friends all around Statesboro looking at houses and finding neighborhoods, and it’s been so much fun. Hopefully, Scott and I will find the perfect first house for the kids and us.

Running update: Not so good. In fact lousy! I can’t seem to get back into a routine after being sick and that really stinks. I’m planning on getting back into my running routine as school starts on Monday.

Note: 1. I know bad things can happen even living in a house in a nice neighborhood. 2. I’m really nervous about grad school.

Vanilla

Yesterday my co-workers said that I was Vanilla: as in style, personality my over presentation of myself. Within the first 3 seconds I immediately thought “No I’m not!” but then I looked down at my brown linen pants with my plain cranberry top and realized “Yes I am.” And then I realized that I was okay with being Vanilla. I rather like being Vanilla. In fact, I’ve never been more accepting and comfortable in my own skin before. I like myself and I have far fewer moments of the “Why the hell did I say that?” or the “Why do I have to be socially retarded?” So this morning when I put on my old trusty Kicks with yet another pair of tan linen pants with an equally boring pink shirt I thought bring on Vanilla and bring on ME.

Jogging update: Being sick put a crimp in my training schedule. I’ve been really disappointed about not being able to be active. I also found that I’m grumpier and I eat SO much more when I haven’t worked out. Such is life. (that’s a Grandmother saying :)) Hopefully, I’ll feel up to a short run tomorrow.

Oh Yeah, I don’t talk about work here but my Harry Potter program went really well! I had to share.

Training: Novice

Well, I’m starting my second week of training. If I follow my 12-week guide I should be ready to run my first Half Marathon by October the 6^th: the Saturday before the wedding. Too bad I have to work that Saturday. And yes I know that GSU has a home game, but it was work that Saturday or not get to go to my own wedding.

This week I’ll be adding strength training along with cross training. And on this new training schedule I’ll only have 1 day of rest every other day is filled with running, cross training or strength training. It’s a pretty interesting schedule and should keep me on my toes. I’m thinking about getting my bike up and running and using it as my cross. I’m really not much of a swimmer but that might be fun or at least a change.

For my running update: I did 4 miles on Saturday in 35:02. My goal was 5 miles, but just walking home was a chore after those first 4. I did try to jog a little on the way back.

I did go see Harry Potter this weekend! And my study is kinda clean. I’m sorry that my blog revolves around all this jogging stuff. At least I’m posting again!

Old Dirty Kicks

My college friend Mitzi and I were talking about the Nike Sport and because she lives 5 hours hours away she asked me to post a picture of my Tennis Shoes with the Runner's Pouch. So there you have it folks. At least you can't smell them.

Watermelon!

I am so jealous! Georgia Southern is serving Watermelon on Sweetheart Circle today and I’m going to miss it. All of you students or if you work on Campus: “Eat some for me!” ah I guess this is what happens when you collect a regular paycheck.


Not much else is happening in this little corner of the web. Jogging update: I'm number 317 out of 558 in my beginners challenge.

UGH!

Today's morning jog SUCKED! I'm starting over NOW! It's going to be good day!

I’m surprised of myself.

Kelley, I’m sure you have heard about all of this from your sister. This is my disclaimer on how boring you might find this post!

Ok, last Sunday I bought the Nike + iPod Sport Kit. The only problem is you have to buy the very expensive Nike shoes that the Kit works with. Luckily, this company Grantwood Technology created the handy Sport Pouch for only $6.99. The down side: you have to order it online and wait a week for it to arrive, especially during a holiday week.

But it came yesterday! And it ROCKED! Seriously, this is the coolest jogging tool EVER. I realized that the loop that I thought was 2 miles is really 3. 3 Miles! I’ve been trying for weeks to jog at least 2 miles and I’ve been doing it the entire time and didn’t know it. Now that is an increase in the self-esteem area.

My one mistake that I did make yesterday was I tool my dog Dez along. Boy was she freaking SLOW! She trailed along behind as far as her leash would let her. And yes I do understand the potty breaks, but still I wanted an accurate view of my time. On the plus side she kept me company and I’ll probably keep taking her with me. I think with the proper jogging leash she can be great. Hehehe It was starting to storm yesterday and we had a huge crack of thunder Man you have never seen that dog take off so fast. I was like “Now that’s what I’m taking about!” At least I know she has it in her.

The other cool feature about the Nike + iPod is that it not only keeps up with your times, distances, calories burned all on your iPod, but you can log on to http://nikeplus.nike.com/nikeplus/ and keep a record of all your runs, sign up for challenges with other people and set goals for yourself. I signed up for this Beginners challenge for the month of July. Already someone has invited me to take part in her challenge. It’s pretty freaking cool.

I think the handiest part of the Nike + iPod (I’m just going to call it Nike Sport from here on out) is that it counted down my miles. There is nothing more encouraging then hearing “300 meters left”, Well Hell Yeah I can do that. It does the same if you set it for time or whatever you want.

Anyway, I'm happy that a friend recommended it to me and I definitely recommend it to anyone who jogs or thinks they want to. It works for walkers t0.

The End

For the last episode of the Sopranos I decided to cook one of Carmela's dishes. It always seemed that she was carrying baked Ziti to her priest, so I found a good recipe and gave it a go. (I actually got this recipe from another blogger who had the same idea)

I have to say that this dish rocked and could easily be made calorie friendly with wheat noodles and low fat cheese. I did have trouble with my noodles being a little crunchy on top, but I think that can be fixed. Baked Ziti with Turkey Meatballs was YUM-O and was almost the perfect Italian ending (No one got whacked) .

BAKED ZITI WITH TURKEY MEATBALLS

For meatballs
1 pound ground turkey
1 large garlic clove, minced
3/4 cup fresh bread crumbs
1/2 cup finely chopped onion
3 tablespoons pine nuts, toasted, cooled, and chopped
1/2 cup minced fresh parsley leaves (preferably flat-leafed)
1 large egg, beaten lightly
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon black pepper
4 tablespoons olive oil

1 pound ziti or penne
1 1/2 cups coarsely grated mozzarella cheese (about 6 ounces)
1 cup freshly grated Romano cheese (about 3 ounces)
about 6 cups winter tomato saucea
15-ounce container ricotta cheese

Make meatballs:In a bowl stir together well turkey, garlic, bread crumbs, onion, pine nuts, parsley, egg, salt, and pepper and form into meatballs about 1 inch in diameter. In a large heavy skillet heat 2 tablespoons oil over moderately high heat until hot but not smoking and cook half of meatballs, shaking skillet, until browned and cooked through, about 4 minutes. Transfer meatballs to paper towels to drain and brown remaining meatballs in remaining 2 tablespoons oil in same manner.
Preheat oven to 375°F. and oil a 3- to 4-quart gratin dish or other shallow baking dish.

In a kettle of salted boiling water cook pasta until just al dente, about 8 minutes, and drain well. In a small bowl toss together mozzarella and Romano.
Spoon about 1 1/2 cups tomato sauce and half of meatballs into prepared dish and spoon half of pasta on top. Spread half remaining sauce and half cheese mixture over pasta. Top with remaining meatballs and drop dollops of ricotta over meatballs. Spread remaining pasta over ricotta and top with remaining sauce and remaining cheese mixture.
Bake ziti in middle of oven 30 to 35 minutes, or until golden, and let stand 10 minutes before serving.Serves 6 to 8.Gourmet February 1994

For Winter Sauce I used sauce out of a jar.

LEIGHA! LEIGHA! LEIGHA!

Imagine arriving to your High School Graduation on a church bus with 30 plus family members. Now add to the mortification: a sign with your name and having your father pull up to the front door so that you and your family members could unload. Welcome to the beginning of my cousin’s high school graduation. We also chanted Leigha! Leigha! Leigha!

I have to say that yes it probably was very embarrassing for Leigha, but she got to ride to her graduation with her entire family: Mom, Dad, brother, grandparents, aunts, uncles, a slew of cousins and one brave friend. A freaking BUS load! How special is that? VERY! It rocked. We all traveled from Georgia, Alabama and Indiana just to be there for her on her special day. Scott and I drove for 12 hours, got lost in Birmingham, and sat through 3 trains at 2 in the morning just to be there to watch her walk across the stage. I have to say that my family has its flaws, but damn we rocked this weekend.

The weekend overall was really good. It had its moments where Scott and I wanted to strangle my parents, but it did teach us some valuable lesson that will come in handy for the wedding. I never realized how hard it would be to NOT automatically DO what my parents wanted. Example: just letting them decided where and when we are going to eat.

Ugh, I never knew deciding on a place to eat would be so hard.

The lesson learned: Scott’s wants and needs come before my parents. (who knew I would have to be taught that?)

Anyway, I hope everyone had a wonderful Memorial Day! Only 4 days left of this workweek and then next week I start my new position. I can’t wait.

I should have some book reviews on the way. I finished 2 books (one I just loved) and started on another that is just amazing.

Wow, It's been along time!

I've been thinking and thinking about updating my blog. This may be a super small post but it's a start.

Reason's for not posting:

1) Even after years of writing literature papers I'm still afraid of writing.
2) I've been bummed out about how my blog looks.
3) I really want to say what I feel on my blog and that takes guts.
4) I'm not so sure anyone actually reads this thing. People have taken me off their friends list. It's not looking very positive.
5) I've kept to myself alot this past year, but now I'm ready to share and be apart of the world.

A few updates:
I bought a gorgeous wedding dress! and yes Scott and I have set a date! We even have a location. We signed the paper work! it's final.

I actually have more to say but I have to get ready for work. By the way I received a promotion. (Warning: From now on I will be tooting my own horn. I recently learned that if you don't celebrate your own accomplishments no one else will. I'm damn well going to enjoy the good stuff in life!)

Have a great day, everyone! (I'm actually writing as if I have an audience! hehe

Wednesday: Hump Day.

Today is my last Wednesday of freedom. That’s right I will truly be in the real world next week. I don’t know why they call it the real world. The world feels pretty real to me right now. I think “real world” should be prefaced with working depending on context of course. The Working Real World. There. That’s what I’ll be entering next week.

Anyway, I do have a full time position at the Statesboro Regional Library. I will be starting next Monday. I’m very excited and relieved. This is such a great gig. Much better than I had hoped for in Statesboro. I’m having a little trouble figuring out how to balance work and Grad School and, you know, my life. I’m planning on cutting back my classes, but I’m just not sure how much is too much, or too little. I’m like the girl with the bears who wanted it just right. All of you Grad Students, or recently graduated Grad Students ring in with some insight here.

________________________________________________________________________

After safely securing my full-time job, I took a few days to reflect on why I choose English Literature for my major in the first place. I can honestly say that for about 2 months (from May to July) I really resented my degree and how useless I felt it was. But now that my chest isn’t so tight and I’m using more coherent language (something other than the F bomb) I want to make a list of why being an English Major is one of the greatest degrees out there, but I want help. I know why I choose this particular major.

Two Reasons:

1.I loved to read.
2.I sucked at writing, but I wanted to prove to myself that I could write and write decently if not well. Grammar still kills me, thus FANBOYS is always in the back of my mind.

So, English Majors, why this degree?

Ahoy Buccaneers!

After watching Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (I absolutely loved this movie!) I’ve decided that Scott and I are going to dress up as Pirates for Halloween. (He doesn't know this yet.) I know, I know it’s only July and I shouldn’t be thinking about Halloween. But, I wanna be a PIRATE! So what, I’m a dork. I’ve already scoped out fabric and costume ideas.

YARRR!

Just for reminders, here are a few pictures from last years Halloween Bash.

Update=boring

Ok, so I have no ideas or time really for posting. But it has been a little over a month since I last posted. So here goes my update:

·Scott gave me Sirius Satellite radio for Valentine’s Day! I’ve really enjoyed it, but I am planning on reading to owner’s manual soon. I’m having lots of trouble working the damn thing. Right now I can’t seem to get it to turn on. I’m sure that it is the operator and not the machine. Uggg I wish I were a technology person.

·Speaking of which, I’ve applied to grad school for Instructional Technology. All that I have left is taking the GRE and I’m going to do that over spring break.
·Well that seems to be about it.

·I had a rough week this past week.
1.I got sick and had to go home to see my family doctor.
2.I’m living with my crappy roommate.
3.One of our dogs Gracie passed away this week. Very unexpected and I’ve been
sad about that.
4.I lost my jump drive and had to rewrite my mid-term. It was only 3 mins late!
5.Dr. Griffin assigned a paper on the same week as her mid-term. Who does that?
It’s so unfair!
·We had a very good Baby Shower for Bean. She received lots of very cool baby stuff that I didn’t even know existed.

·Scott took me to see “A Date Movie.” It was funny and I laughed all the way through it.

·Becca is going to come visit Statesboro next weekend!

That’s it.

Living for the future

We all do it. You know the sayings. “When I get that new job…,” or “Just as soon as I get a pay raise…” I have a few of my own “Things will be better just as soon as I’m out of this stupid Spanish class,” and “If I just had my own space!” My personal favorite so far “If I just didn’t have to sit in the closet to: A) Have a private phone call B) Steal the neighbors Internet C) Get away from my roommate-- then things would be better. I want my own place!”

How can I learn to appreciate the here and now? How can you all out in cyberspace learn to live for the moment? I spent this past weekend worried about a test. Then I spent the week upset about the same test. Now, in retrospect I’m kicking myself for the wasted time. The one time this week when I put everything aside and just enjoyed myself was at the GUS basketball game. Boy, did it feel great!

I’m not quite sure how to live in the here and now, because, frankly, sometimes the here and now just isn’t that great. Life comes in cycles, at least that’s how I see it, and people just keep moving forward. The one thing Scott has taught me recently is to keep a positive outlook. Unfortunately, I’ve been a little black rain cloud.

Does it really matter that I’m sitting in a closet that isn’t really my closet just so I can have a little time to myself? Not really, not in the long run. In fact this is probably the only time I’ll ever have the chance to sit in a closet and write. I’ve just made another college student memory.

I may still get down sometimes or have a rough day, but I’m going to do my best to remain positive. I’m going to try to enjoy life as it comes. I just don’t want to regret my life and my choices because I was to busy being a little black rain cloud.

Childhood Books

I’ve been pretty laid back this week so, I don’t have any interesting stories to tell or anything to complain about. Because, well:

1. I spend my free time going to the gym.
2. If I’m not at the gym I’m sleeping.
3. If I’m not at the gym or sleeping I’m in class.

I don’t even go to the library anymore. I’m becoming a homebody.

My substitute roommate and I made plans yesterday to go and eat Mexican together. This is something we do. It’s kinda been our thing. But today I was to worn out from sleeping to want to go out. (Yes from sleeping, and that is why I’m up at 12 writing a blog) Instead I ate a frozen pizza and watched the national news. I don’t even have a minor adventure to write about. I don’t think going to the bank to deposit my financial aid check counts.


I though I would leave you guys with my reading list from my Literature for Adolescents class.

Holes Louis Sachar
Bud, Not Buddy Christopher Paul Curtis
The Bicycle Man David L. Dudley (The Department Chair)
Walk Two Moons Sharon Creech
When Zachary Beaver Came to Town Kimberly Willis Holt
Behind the Mountains Edwidge Danticat
Under The Blood-Red Sun Graham Salisbury
Leaving Home Hazel Rochman and Darlene Z. McCampbell
Speak Laurie Halse Anderson
Rainbow Boys Alex Sanchez
godless Pete Hautman
whale talk Chris Crutcher

Let me know if any of you guys read any of these books as an adolescent. For that matter, let me know what you guys read growing up. I was a huge Judy Bloom fan myself. I loved her “Fudge” books and Blubber was a huge hit with me because, well I was the chubby kid. Who can forget Are you There God? It’s Me, Margaret. I was really into the series books: The Boxcar Children, Nancy Drew, Sweet Valley High, Goose Bumps and the list goes on. I loved C.S. Lewis as well. The Magician’s Nephew was oddly one of my favorites, second to The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.

Sometimes people lose themselves in Southern Hospitality.

Hospitality in itself is a good thing. Treating others with warmth and generosity is what human beings should naturally do. Southern Hospitality, however, is an entirely different beast. Southern Hospitality becomes not about just being kind and welcoming, but about being pleasing and never stepping on others toes. Maybe it isn’t Southern Hospitality that I have a problem with, but the expectations placed upon southern women.

Maybe I have a problem with standing up for myself.

Growing up in the south is like growing up in another world. As a child I was taught Yes Ma’am, No Ma’am, Yes Sir, and No Sir. If I answered my mother with yes she would respond with “Yes what?” and the child version of Jessica never said no. Saying “NO” to my Mother ensured a good ‘ole fashioned spanking. If you were going to use the word you had better be prepared for an ass beating. Honestly, I cannot recall any of my siblings or me using the word no. Even No Ma’am, if used in certain context, could make my Mom’s eyebrows rise.

So why do I feel like I’ve lost myself in Southern Hospitality, or rather social expectations? I’ m drawn back to the Yes Ma’am and No Ma’am’s of my childhood. As an adult I’m no longer required to treat people respectfully, I just do. And honestly there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Recently I’ve found that I’ve become more than just respectful, I’ve tried to become pleasing. I want those that I care about the most to be happy, and I’ve sacrificed my own happiness for theirs: A recipe for disaster.

In Mexico people think that it is rude to not give you directions. If you ask a Mexican how to get somewhere, and even if they don’t’ know the way they will make up something. Yes, this is completely unhelpful, but it’s the culture. Southern Hospitality has the same need to please. If you’re hosting a party or just a group of people, as host you go out of your way to make sure everyone is happy. As a guest you accept whatever your host offers you. That’s Southern Hospitality at it’s best.

So how can I keep the charming side of Southern Hospitality while remaining true to myself? This past weekend my boyfriend was cooking me an egg and I explained to him exactly how I wanted it, but it didn’t turn out as I had expected. At that second I had a moment. My thought process went like this:

I can accept this egg and eat it as is, or I can just tell him that he got it wrong.
But, if I eat that egg he’ll think that’s how I really like them, and I’ll be stuck eating eggs that way forever.
I don’t want to be difficult.
I’ll just cook another egg myself.

The southern girl in me found an acceptable way to try and get what I wanted while still being pleasing. But why does everything have to be pleasing. Why couldn’t I have just said, “That’s not how I eat my eggs” especially after having explained how I wanted it cooked. I came across as rude by offering to cook another egg. I wasn’t respectful or pleasing, but I was trying to be both and get what wanted.
I want to be warm and welcoming and generous while still being myself.

Recently, my roommate and her family have taken over my apartment. I’ve become a nomad living with my boyfriend on the weekends and another friend during the week. I’ve been totally stressed out about this entire living situation, but the Southern Girl in me has just bitten my tongue, but I’ve had enough.

As the saying goes “I need to grow some balls!” I’m tired of getting taken advantage of.
I’m ready to stand up for myself. My New Year’s resolution has become not just to lose weight, but also to take pride in myself: To realize that I deserve to be treated respectfully, and that my needs, my wants and my dreams and my wishes are just as important as anyone else.

This isn’t about Southern Hospitality. This is about learning to be myself.

January Workout update

I’m on the horse, as Stacey likes to say, the workout horse that is. This is week 3 of the great workout plan and I’ve hit a wall.

I feel like I’m doing things right: Cardio Monday, Wednesday and Friday and weights on Tuesday and Thursday with some cardio. But week three has found me weak and tired. When I’m jogging on the treadmill my arms feel sooo heavy and I have to really force myself to push through.

Today, which is weights and cardio day, I almost gave up. I did my weight training with the intention of hopping on an elliptical for a few minutes. So when the time came for cardio, of course, all the machines were full. I just decided to forget it and leave. But as fate would have it a girl got off the elliptical as I was walking out, and I took it as a sign and hopped right on. It was a good workout.

But here’s the deal: I put back on the 1 pound that I had lost over the past 2 week and added half a pound. ADDED! Talk about disappointment. I know I know muscle is stronger then fat and that’s probably where the weight came from. Maybe I should just change my weigh in day from Tuesday to Wednesday. I don’t know. I’m just going to push on through and hope for the best.

I hope everyone else’s is doing well with the New Year resolutions. Just think the first month is almost over!

Why me?

This semester already seems to be picking up from last semester. I would like a beer and a cigarette while I cry. I promised myself that I would make the best of my last 4 classes at Georgia Southern, but really I just wish I didn’t have to take them. I’m tired of being stressed and emotional all the time, but most of all I hate Spanish!

Interlude

Ok I have to admit that I’m a complete dork. About 2 days ago I turned on my new laptop to write a blog. I felt inspired and was ready to put my thoughts into words. As soon as I turned my computer on it said I had a virus. So I consulted my sister’s boyfriend, he suggested I use my parent’s computer to google the virus. So I did, and of course that was useless because I understood nothing about the virus other than it comes through your e-mail. I then called my boyfriend and he suggested I get serious computer help. So I did, this morning in fact. It turned out that I’m just a paranoid dork; my laptop is fine and was just warning me that I wasn’t protected against this sober or sober virus.

So all you guys get is this boring post until I have something of interest written.
But I do hope you all had a great New Years and are enjoying the 1st of the year. This is my last week of freedom before my last semester of school begins on the 9th.